Simple Thoughts Of You

Simple Thoughts Of You Part 1:

To think that the Lord knew you before you were conceived; nay, to know that He has loved you before creation came to be and now, He calls you His child. How can my heart not rejoice though troubles may fare? Or celebrate though failures abound? He loves me stronger than any deluge of sorrow. He loves me greater than death itself and has called me by name.


Yours,

J.S.Yoo

_________________________________________


Simple Thoughts Of You Part 2:

To think that the Lord forgives me of my past mistakes; nay, to know that He no longer remembers my sins when He forgives me is a grace taken for granted. How my heart takes lightly the riches of His kindness, His tender mercy, and His longsuffering to which my heart should run gracefully toward His warm embrace…I cannot fathom. How can my heart not respond with tearful affection? Or reciprocate due kindly His intimate pursuit of me? His grace covers me more than the air in which I breathe. His fingerprints are visible upon my heart with every waning breath. Daily, He bids me, “Come, live in my grace”. ...Such knowledge is too wonderful for me…

Yours,

J.S.Yoo

Something For Nothing OR A Beautiful Exchange

There is nothing that can explain the unpredictable nature of the human heart. Its fickle behaviors, unwarranted nostalgia, the frangible pillars of emotions, and, yes, even its unprecedented, inadvertent step towards falling in love are all catalysts to the seasonal changes of life, which makes life all the more exciting and filled with colors.

Nevertheless, in short, the heart can be a real pain in the Ass. Seriously.

There are motives hidden deep in its chasms shrouded in a billow of mystery; intent disguised as wolves in sheep's clothing; and, the most encumbering item of them all, its seemingly insatiable desire for longing.

"The heart is more deceitful than all else and is desperately sick; Who can understand it?" (Jeremiah 17:9, Italics mine).

See now the fallen nature of Man! The desperate need of grace and mercy beckons the heart to draw near, but it cannot hear...it cannot see... If the heart does not see the need of the remedy grace and mercy brings--like the watchmen on the wall in the face of invasion--she will not desire it and, consequently, will be overtaken by a deluge of sorrow.

Only when the heart goes back to her roots--the Garden of Eden--where nakedness and transparency were nothing to be ashamed of will she then begin to see herself in her despondent state and intimately know the desperation that has been there all along. Only then will the layers of the human heart be unraveled. Only then will she be true to herself.

However, the heart stations a flaming sword, which turns in every direction guarding the way to the tree of gladness. This is not, however, like the sword the Lord God had placed in the Garden; on the contrary, it is a sword that was forged in heartache, agony, wounds, and sufferings resulting in fear. Fear. It blinds the eyes from beholding the goodness that surrounds her; it prevents the heart from grasping the intimacy that has always pursued her.

And there is only one true antidote to fear...love.

"[For] there is no fear in love; but perfect love drives out all fear..." (1 John 4:18, Italics mine). Love is far more violent than the sword of fear for it was forged in God--for "God is love" (1 John 4:8). When these two blades joust for your heart, fear must crumble. Yes, it is intimidating at first glance, but the reward--love--is an incomparable joy nothing can ever dare compete with. I do not discourse on the matter of guarding your heart for this must be steadfast, faithful... a constant. Rather, it is more a matter of what is guarding your heart.

The only question is: Are you willing to let love in?

This love is ambrosial. It satisfies all hunger and quenches all thirst. It is comparable, but not exactly similar to, to the fruit of knowledge of good and evil wherein it opens the eyes...open your eyes. When she is willing to receive, she will then not only begin to enjoy the treasures that surround her, but be enabled, empowered to choose to treasure what surrounds her.

"...for where your treasure is, there will your heart be also" (Matthew 6:21).

What will you treasure?

Nay, whom will you treasure?

I surmise these two questions cannot be answered as of this moment.
We must track back to the first one.


Heart, are you willing to let love in?


Yours,

J.S.Yoo

To My Future Wife Part 5

Can you believe it O fairest of women? I'm 26 turning 27 this year. Those that are already in their thirties and forties say that I'm still young (which is true) and then proceed to give that I'm-older-than-you-which-makes-me-wiser-than-you little smirk on their face where the dimples only show ever so slightly--more like a crease than anything--and the eyes gently, but very subtly, dip. Well...DUH. They're in their thirties and forties way passed their prime while I'm currently living mine. 8) (cool face).

Anyway, the sub-point is, I'm growing up. (slowly?)

The major point is this: I cannot fully grow and mature into the man of God He desires me to be as a single man, a bachelor (wow...that 'B' word really sticks out now); there's a limit, a threshold if you will. As a bachelor (whoa...that 'B' word again), I have come to realize I can only grow so much...

Now, O fairest of women, before you try and correct me by saying things like, "You're not trusting in God enough to grow your character"; "Of course you can grow as a single!"; or, which is my favorite, "Joseph...all you NEED is Jesus"--all of this, by the way, is a total turn on and makes you a total fox--permit me to explain my reasoning.

Here are a few of my thoughts. I'll connect the dots at the end. Enjoy!

1. I believe God desires to mold me into the man of God He desires me to become. He promised He would. Furthermore, I also believe He is preparing, growing, and maturing me to be a husband to and for you and vice versa. In short, He's preparing you and me for each other, to be ready for each other, ultimately, till death do us part, to love one another deeply...of course, in due season--in His timing.

2. The way God deals with His children is unique to each individual. The way He grows and matures each and everyone of us is different, purposeful, and vibrant. Why? Because it is a lifelong process--relationship--until He calls us home.

3. As the saying goes, "My wife completes me".

4. As Adam once said, "This [woman] is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh". Layman's interpretation: "My wife is my better half".

5. I need you and you need me; it goes past beyond our wants.


Dear wife...you know that God loves both you and me. You and I both know He wants what is best for us; we both know He wants to conform us to the image of His Son. What an amazing promise!

This is what I am certain of.

As a bachelor, I will only mature to a certain point; I will not be the perfected husband when you meet me, but I will be ready. I will still harbor weaknesses. I will still be filled with many shortcomings. Be that as it may, when we meet in God's timing, it will be perfect. God never makes a mistake and He plans perfectly; I just need to remain faith-filled and faithful to Him.

As to the reason why I am certain of the fact that I will only grow to a certain point is simply because of this: God wants to use you to help me grow FULLY into the man of God He desires me to be. And, with confidence I'll say, He desires to use me to help you grow into the beautiful woman of God He desires YOU to be. You will be my pillar and I will be yours. Of this, I am certain.

What a beautiful waltz this is O fairest woman!

If God is preparing me for you and you for me, of course I will not mature to my full potential WITHOUT you in my life!!!

Why?

Because every good and perfect gift comes from the Father above. You, O dear wife, are that perfect gift. I only pray you see all of this through the same lens I see them in: faith.

Wife, I wait patiently for you.

Yours truly,

J.S.Yoo

The Leper Rerecorded with MORE REVERB!

Finally got to finish this song.  It's got guitar rifts, a new chorus, and REVERB! WOOT!

I hope you guys enjoy!  Critiques are more than welcomed!

https://soundcloud.com/joseph-sky-yoo/the-leper-original

I've been so encouraged by the Milk + Honey team.

There's nothing more satisfying than to know that God would use insignificant people like us to make a significant difference in the history of those around us.

Like the Apostle Paul, may the love of Christ compel us to go.

Take Two

The excitement that life brings stems from the emotions of the heart
It's fickle behavior wars with rational and logical thinking.
The mind. The heart.
Inevitably, the Soul.
They all tie together to create me.
Someone no one on this earth can be.
Only me.

The surgeon's knife cuts deep only to sow it up again
Healing comes with time
And with time new chapters begin to form
Closing one, onto a new. Forward.
We must always move forward.

I am a canvass that was once blank
Now. Colors come in all shapes and sizes.
The smell of blue is wonderful
The sounds that red makes is exquisite.
I wonder what it would if you couple them all together

Oh the taste in my palate.
Sweet. Rich. Bitter.

I am a POIEMA.
Onward.

I've lost something dear to me.  It was so close to my heart I didn't even notice it was gone.



I need to find my "music".  Where are you...

Now that I've noticed her disappearance, it feels like she left a chasm in my heart.



....how did it go unnoticed for so long...

To My Future Wife Part 4

 To My Future Wife,

It's been awhile.
So I've been thinking (aren't you glad that I think?), not about who/where you are and what your name is in this reality we share, but, rather, who's you are.  Sounds strange doesn't it?  Strange because when I think about the context of this letter to you-To My Future Wife Part 4- its as though the answer to that question should be clear, cliche, and simple: you're mine and I am yours.
                               However, there's something unsettling inside me...

I've been praying for you.

In the past few days, I've been really praying for you.  Its been a total fascination: the more you grow in knowledge with understanding of who God is, your words begin to take on a new form.  I've seen how my prayers before Dad have been transfigured before my eyes without me ever realizing.  I've heard the echoes of supplication in my heart for you beginning a new rhythm, an unfamiliar rhythm.

      ...And oh how I've felt my lips tremble when I make mention of you..when I lift petitions regarding you...

that Dad would bless:

Your relationship with your family- that you would find spending time with your mother and father more precious and valuable than memories made with friends.
  That you would glean from your mother's wisdom and not disregard them
   That you would see your father's love to a daughter as an incomparable joy
     only you can know
   That you would find the resolve to make honoring your parents a lifelong mission
    That you would develop respect and trust with your sibling(s): biological and spiritual
Your mind, intellect, and education- that you would not only be sharpened, but be the sharpener to those who need it- to edify, teach and make aware.
Your decision-making- that whatever path you choose, the Holy Spirit will guide and lead you, giving you the peace that Jesus promised He would give.

...Your heart...
                          And lo, here is what brings my lips to tremble...

...I pray that Dad would bless Your heart- that Jesus Himself would guard your heart in all of His jealousy over you; in that, whosoever should woo your heart it would be because He has allowed it....


And so I've been thinking...

I've been remembering Who's you are and I cannot help myself but to be perturbed at the thought of it.

You must remember dear Future Wife, that one of the scariest things any (aspiring) man of God can do is: to court a daughter of a Holy God who's indignation is Righteous; who's judgment is Just; and who's Love for you is more jealous than the grave...

Perhaps this is what it means to pray in the fear of the Lord...

Oh Fairest of Women!

...Before you are my Wife,
                                you are and will always be first...
                                                          the most beautiful daughter of the Most High God...

His praise is everywhere

Thank You Lord for such a beautiful wave~
It reminds me of the love You gave to me~
I want to reflect Your love to the surfers that I meet todayyyy~
Every wave is a gift from You~
Tra la la la dee dahmm~~~

She's Cute. Even with short hair.

One of God's greatest gifts: the elation of joy that runs with laughter.

Rule #1

When you really think about it, there's no point in "getting used to it".  You just live it.

When she comes, she'll just pass you by; unless, you seize the moment and create your own opportunity.

Summon the Big Balls.



Balls to the Wall.

I don't care. My dog is cuter than yours.

One of God's greatest gifts - life's simplest pleasure.

You Put A Spell On Me

I'm finding myself missing you for no apparent reason.  It's like a part of me has lost itself in you, which isn't really true, but, still, the feeling still lingers on like the smell of a bonfire in your laundry basket after a night at the beach.
















Maybe we should sit down and converse a bit just to see how life has been strolling by.  I'll make you a steaming latte pulling ristretto espresso shots so you don't taste much of the bitterness in coffee. Unless, you like the bitterness in coffee like I do.  I'll even pour the contents into a nice, but not overly luxuriant, ceramic mug that says, "I love white people" on it just to make it a conversation starter.

Or not.

Maybe.  Ahh forget it.

I'd rather surf.

She Is A Thing Of Beauty

She has her own rules you need to play by because they aren't man-made.  There's no room for rebellion.

No Shadow Of Turning

There is nothing like the sweet smell of ocean salt when you breathe hot air against your skin. The smell itself is not like a heavenly bliss where one would want to bathe in; however, the reminiscence of what brought in such a fragrance is.  Bliss.  

It has been a little over a year since I began my endeavor into the cool, rad, better-than-hipster, an-activity-that-gets-the-elderly-ladies, world of surfing. 

I evolved.  

I've seen the results of my metamorphosis this past week.  From surfing a 9 foot longboard to a 6 foot short-board, how could I not?  I am able to walk closer and closer to the tip of a longboard going up and down a glassy wave.  So glassy you can see your reflection on it. 

And in that moment of reflection, you begin to realize a little bit more what kind of power the ocean can have on your eyes.  

Even staring at a looming mound of water so beautifully shaped is something words cannot express.  On one end there's excitement.  And on the other, depending on how big it is, terror.  It isn't so much a terror that makes you want to runaway, rather, it adds to the rush factor, the excitement, the stoke, and the gravity of what lies down that wave:  Joy.

-----

It has been a little over a month, one and a half to be exact, since I began my step of faith into broadening my horizon of what ministry is.

I'm changing.

I've seen how relationships are affected by the community (can I say 'church'?) that you're in, or not in, during this short amount of time.  From serving a church for 8+ years to not being plugged into a community with accountability, how could I not?  I feel like I'm being tossed by the waves of temptation and the only thing keeping me afloat is the surfboard of conscience (yeah, I had to toss that in there).  

And in that moment of temptation waging war with your conscience, you begin to realize what a wretched soul you really are.

Even musing on the decision that I've made to say my adieus, I know...I know everything has changed.  On one end there's rest.  And on the other,  depending on how I fair upon this pilgrim's progress, fear.  It isn't so much a fear that makes me want to avert my resolve, rather, it adds to the understanding of my dependence on God's mercies, the strength that comes when you wait upon the Lord, the discipline it takes to shine His light, and the reward that awaits at the end of this narrow path: Joy.

There is a warm chorus being sung in my heart in spite of trials, faithlessness, or even change.

So, will you join me?

Great is Thy Faithfulness, O God my Father

 There is no shadow of turning with Thee

Thou changest not, Thy compassions, they fail not

 As Thou hast been, Thou forever will be.

Great is Thy Faithfulness

 Great is Thy Faithfulness

Morning by morning new mercies I see

 All I have needed Thy hand hath provided-

Great is Thy Faithfulness, Lord, unto me...

Step One: Food For Thought and Boy Was I Hungry.

Perhaps, it's starting to hit me.  Maybe this leave was a good thing.  No...I know it was.

A ministry should never define who you are.

You were not a small group leader because you were one in a ministry.  Nor were you a college core leader because you were one in a ministry.  And, to the most tender part of my heart, you were not a praise leader because a ministry had defined you as one.

No.

You are who you are because of who and what the Holy Spirit has done in your life and will continue to do.

The challenge that be faces me now is: will I live up to the same standards, if not higher, as a praise leader off the stage as opposed to being on it?

It's easy to live a life shining bright for Christ when the limelight is on you.  ~Shining ~Shimmering. ~Splen~~did.  Oops...wrong context. Amen. I mean...Ahem.

Enough with my failed attempt for a comic relief.  On to the point I'm trying to make:

It's easy to live a life shining bright for Christ when the limelight is on you, when accountability and community is at your door step; and when you're on the email list of a leadership thread replying to the next big event or retreat or prayer meeting or missions meeting or any other church meeting you can think about.  And, to this I can confidently say: when the limelight is on, it is easier said and it isn't as bad carrying it out.

Jesus once said, "You are the light of the world.  A city on a hill cannot be hidden.  Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl.  Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house."

If my light isn't shining in this dark world, it's because I put a bowl over it.
If I put a bowl over my light its because I'm to ashamed to give light to the One who lives in my house, my body...His temple...in order to expose Him to everyone who sees.

To expose Jesus to the world and the world be exposed by Jesus.

The wisest and most foolish thing about this whole undertaking--and no this is not a contradiction-- is that in God's wisdom He designed for His Glory, Honor, Praise, His very SON to be exposed by the most foolish of people. UndeservingPowerlessBlemishedWeak. Human beings.

Crazy isn't it?  For a person like you and me to bring Glory, Honor, and Praise to the One and True Living, Omnibenevolent God?  For a person like you and me undertaking a daunting, yet most undeserving, privilege of showing the world to Jesus and Jesus to the world?


If you happen to fall, Romans 8:1 yourself for crying out loud.  Pick yourself up and keep going.


A ministry should never define who you are.  


However,

how you walk in step with the Holy Spirit on a daily basis...will.

During a ten minute break at work, an endless waltz.

I saw the moon today.  It's not like it was the first time I saw it in my life. Obviously.  It wasn't as though a new revelation dawned upon my frangible mind as to feed its curiosity like a mother bird landing on its nest to feed her young.  On the contrary, it was a plain moon in plain daylight almost at 3 quarters full.  Plainly.  Nothing new. Nothing special.  Nothing surprising about it at all.  The delight we shared came from the musings that followed suit when I gazed at it.

The moon has seen all of human history since it was spoken into existence.  Even mine.  It has been hanging upon an invisible thread endlessly waltzing around in perfect tempo either in daylight, within the azure sky, or in the night, the hours in which we should thank its illumination.

And so I mused.  I surmised that the moon was lonely from tirelessly pursuing the sun in the horizons, but never reaching the closeness it desires.  Even the time allotted to them, on those rare occasions, is never enough to warm its cold mass floating in the sky.  Perhaps, it desires more from the sun.  Perhaps, the sun clothing the moon from afar with raiments bedecked with light did not satisfy this endless waltz they shared.  Whether the moon was content, I could not answer.  It reminded me of the ancient kings and queens and how they did not share bed chambers in the very kingdom they owned.  The queen would have to wait for the king's visitation to her chambers upon his own volition.  Whether the queen grinned or grimaced from the king's visit, or lack thereof, it did not matter.

And so I mused.  I surmised again that the moon must be jealous of the sun.  Humanity wakes when the sun rises in the horizon; its popular.  People make time to enjoy the sun on more occasions than not.  And when the moon rises in its glorious dress full of radiance when the sun sleeps, most of humanity stays locked inside their homes and only a few come out to appreciate it. Perhaps, even in daylight when the moon is up, the sun does not even notice it.  Perhaps, the sun's own radiance hides the moon as if ashamed of its blemish like leafless tress hiding their colors from the dread of winter until spring.

Fascinating isn't it?  How the moon's brilliance in the night provokes love and intimacy on this earth and, to its unwarranted extreme, cultic practices and bizarre rituals.  It has witnessed love and romance; heartbreak to heartache, life unto even death.  Empathy overtakes me.  Whether the moon, witnessing intimacies and tragedies, has found hope, or lack thereof, to waltz on, I could not answer.

And so I mused.  I surmised that the moon desired a companion.  A second moon just beneath it.


And then I wondered what it would be like to live a life under two moons.



And then it hit me.  A question.

What if its the sun pursuing the moon?

And so I stopped musing because I realized what an endless waltz this was.

I realized why I stopped...

Stupid June.

I had a dream.  It was a peculiar one that had the fragrance of nostalgia scented all around it.  They were episodes of familiar emotions that produced such a familiar nostalgia as I woke.  Perhaps it's the month that triggered such a series of events in my mind like a rookie novelist finding words to write inspired by the change in seasons: the mysterious, unbeknownst time when winter turns to spring and spring to summer.
 I find it fascinating how scents can be a tool to trigger memories in recent and far pasts of the mind of a 24 (soon to be 25...) year old.  It's as if it were a universal language that any human being is well acquainted with, yet, it holds a unique power that only the individual can translate.

14 more days and it'll be 6 years and counting.

"Like an old mother staring at an age old epitaph, I still wonder what it would be like if you were still     around.  I let my heart sink in to view the stench of Earth's death with eyes like eagles, wings caught in Summer's breeze and fixed on the panorama--its endless--as my heart pleads the please."

I don't know about the rest of the world, the society I live in, even the sphere of influence that I have around me, but I feel as if the passing of a loved one inevitably triggers your mind to think about all of the relationships you have, or, acquired.  Perhaps it is this month that brought about an unwarranted nostalgia.

She can be so rude.  Barging in uninvited.  In one context, she can become the life of the party sparking old romances with old crushes.  In another, well, she becomes the undesirable reminder that you're just a hopeless romantic that cannot seem to find love.  Sappy. I know.

Strange.  As I recall the moment she barged in as I awoke, she stayed only a brief moment like a crow landing on your porch with a single caw and flying away as if it saw what it needed to see.

She's a powerful one this nostalgia.  She has the power to freeze time, or, rather, retard its tempo to such a degree and allow the mind to recall almost a quarter century of vivid memories--details only you can remember--in a span of a minute, maybe three.  Not only the vividness, but the joys.

The emotional and annoying part of this all?

The nostalgic joys of pleasantries and company (namely you, yes you (and yes this is a slight tangent)) did not match up to the claims on my reality.  It reminded me of how beautiful I thought of you when I first heard you laugh and the irreplaceable moments when words were not exchanged, yet, your presence was all I needed to breathe in.  Because in those moments, I thought this hopeless romantic heart of mine actually had a beat and rhythm and finally found the one who shared the same.

Enough of my crap.  I end with this:


"Elmer Yoo, behave up there, don't be flirting with them pretty angels".


Sincerely your little brother who has way too many useless problems to deal with and deserves an ass beating from you,

Joseph Sky Yoo


P.S.  I'm way older than you now, so I guess that means you're MY little brother.  Sucker.
P.S.S.  I can almost see you beating my ass for saying that just now.
P.S.S.S. I'd give anything in the world for you to beat my ass for a good minute just to see you one more time...even if it is on the floor with a busted nose and a raccoon eyed face.  I'd be smiling the whole way down..

Exit Signs.

The dawn is inevitable and so is the night.

There are colors left untasted, 

scents that have not been heard, 

and thoughts that have not been kissed.

Is it not a matter of perspective or must I labor to what end?

Vexed on this endeavor, I find little resolve.
'Tis a losing brawl this one-sided street has become.

Lead not the wanderer astray from things hoped for.

Home. Companions. Roots. Love..

And so the doors begin to close as the unceasing eyes still hungers.

Has the colors left my palates curious?
Will I never be moved by the smells that strike many a chord?

Or, perhaps, the musings of a little boy cannot handle


an acquaintance with romance.

Still.  

The page turns..